Sunday 14 January 2018

One step forward. Two steps back.

Early November and I'm able to shuffle around without crutches. It's a great thing, but painful, my whole body hurts, my right hip hurts more than my left leg, using one crutch has strained a side muscle so I just have to walk now.
Shuffling means I can do some things, so I'm building a new seating area on the roof terrace & I'm kind of lunging Rayo. I've been having such fun with him! I say kind of lunging because what I'm actually doing is asking him to bend evenly on both sides if his body, and to keep his head low, I begin my session with flexing his head to each side and encouraging him to really stretch by holding carrots just out of reach..he always gets the carrot of course! And he gets what I'm asking him to do as the session goes on.. They're only short sessions because I stop when he gets it, which is pretty quick & this is perfect because I can only do a hobbly shuffle (which is all you really need to do in the centre of his small circle). This is all done really calm and really easy.. I probably look ridiculous bending my own body, calming my own self, willing him to match me, but he does it, he looks at me out of the corner of his eye, cocks his ear towards me and drops his nose then you see his back come up, his pace goes suddenly elevated and perfect & he says oh! I'm doing it! He feels great, I feel great, because we know we understand each other & we stop then, so he realises that's all I want.
I'm trying to help him to be relaxed, soft, supple and strong, ready for riding.

The roof terrace seating is looking nice & feels very comfortable, we've all been lounging out there for hours in the late summer sun, between work sessions I should add!

Our long ride next year is still the focus of our intentions, but please forgive us! We made a sad but practical decision to sell our Golden girl.. No! I hear you saying.. But she's only gone down the road to our friends small riding centre & is in a very happy herd there. Meanwhile Rayo is overjoyed to have Tio back to himself!

So we are going with just our boys & a lot less equipment! Remember it took us 3 hours minimum to pack up & leave each day? Well next time we'll be a lot quicker!

Mark is pretty much better, though still limps occasionally.. I really can't believe how much time has gone by with both injuries.
He takes Tio out regularly & usually takes Rayo by lead rein. So both horses are gaining a bit of fitness after their restful summer.
Its rained at last so winter coats are coming, grass too in places..

Today I got on Tio! Walked him around a bit & got off again feeling elated! I look elated in the photo, though Tio doesn't look so happy, perhaps sensing the occasion by the tightness of the reins!
Also, today I drove my car! At last I can depress the clutch!
So that's two forms of transport within my reach, 'shanks pony' is going to take a bit longer as it's terribly slow & still a bit painful.

Crikey! I can't believe I wrote that in November & here I am not much further on.
Didn't realise I had left it unposted, so here you get a double whammy.

It's now 14th January.
Tomorrow I'm going to try to ride Tio again and yesterday I drove the car back from Cadiar without too much trouble (trouble being pain).
You see, my knee has been a problem, the pin and screws have caused alot of pain when under pressure, my hip and back have been problematic due to the effects of compensation.
The last time I rode Tio, I tried a trot & the jolting was unbearable. I cried.
Not through pain but through feeling totally deflated and dis-empowered.
It's just so awful not being capable if something that you have always been not just good at, but it's like second nature to me, being in the saddle, moving with the horse, able to deal with anything the horse might do.
Tio shied at something, he was playing to my weakness, he would have liked to gallop home and was looking for an excuse!
The feeling of helplessness got to me & obviously got to him!
Inspite of my insecurity I rode him home (WALKING TIO!) but haven't tried again since.

Rayo remains my prize, I can't trust him to just walk, especially after all this time not being ridden. When Mark takes the two out, I usually groom & prepare Rayo & he's desperate for me to get on! He nudges me to say it, come on! Let's go!
I can't wait! But waiting is what I have been doing now, since 30th of May - last year!

Oh Happy New year! In which we will make it to England with our horses & get hitched!
I'll tell you what, to be on the trail again, to be just us on our two boys in the wilderness, come hell or high water! That's where I'm gonna be!